Sunday, August 15, 2010

Happy 2nd Birthday to Our Sweet Little Little Angel, Allie!

Dear Allie,

Oh, how I wish you were here to celebrate this special day! I miss you more than words can express, and I often pray for God to let me dream of you at night. What I would give for that split second: to see you again, to feel as though I am with you again, to catch a whiff of your adorable baby scent again, to see your smile again, to hold you in my arms again, to kiss you again. I'm left with only memories, which I keep so dear to my heart. So many things have happened that I wish you could experience with us here on Earth.

One, is the fact that you are going to be a big sister! How precious it would have been to have my sweet girls playing together. We also traveled to Disney World this past summer, and every time a little girl passed by I thought of you and how much you would have loved seeing the princesses. I would also have loved for you to witness how much your big brother loves you. He misses you tremendously, and he still asks and talks about you all the time. It really shows in how much he worries about your new baby sis. The experience has been quite difficult for us all, but we have faith that we will see you again.

Mason continues to be his curious self and asks many questions that are even hard for your daddy and me to answer sometimes. One that sticks out in my mind, especially on days like today, is, "Will Allie grow old in Heaven?" This one always makes me think. When I see other two year olds walking and talking, it is easy for me to question and try to imagine what you would have been like here on Earth as a two year old. Would you still have your red hair, or would it have turned blonde like your brother's? Would it be curly or straight? Would you be shy and quiet, or a little 'pistol'? What color would your eyes have been? What would your voice sound like? What type of laugh would you have? How badly would you have your daddy wrapped around your little finger? :) These are all characteristics that are easy for me imagine because they are characteristics that I am familiar with on Earth, but I don't know what it is like in Heaven. Your birthday makes me revert back to your brother's question, and I try to think about what you might be like now. Are you still my precious tiny baby that gets held and loved on by Angels and loved ones, or are you a bubbly toddler that's full of energy and happiness, or are you a completely different Being that we cannot even comprehend until we get to Heaven? I know what I like to believe to be true, and I guess that is just what I will continue doing until I see you again in Heaven.

I hope you have a wonderful Birthday in Heaven, and please know that Mommy, Daddy, and Mason will be thinking of you today like always! We love you so much, and we thank God for allowing us to be your family. You continue to be such a blessing to us, and today we celebrate you! We miss you so much baby girl! Happy 2nd Birthday!


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